Bullying just has to stop…This is Olivia Penpraze- She is dead


This is the saddest thing I have read about and watched in a long long time, maybe ever, she is not a criminal, nor did she commit any crimes. But what happened to her was criminal.
update 21/01/14, at a recent request via the family, please support the following campaign and excellent website to stop the bullying that leads to our precious innocent kids ending their own lives.

“>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sa6U_keGHlU%5D

“>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QePopHs6XIc%5D

http://www.angels4olivia.com.au/
Olivia Penpraze attempted suicide for the final time last week. But she had been dying on the inside for a long time. I urge you all, as parents, teachers and other significant adults with children in your care, to sit down and watch this video she made only weeks before attempting suicide for the final time. I am a dad with 3 kids, and have maybe shed a tear once in ten years, but I’m proud to say I shed more than a few watching this girls pain in her video…Her parents have allowed the video to stay online, in the hope in can help us all.

PLEASE TELL SOMEONE, TELL ME, YOUR MUM, A FRIEND OR NEIGHBOUR.PEOPLE DO CARE AND WILL LISTEN

Mostly I imagine, to stop another precious child killing themselves after being bullied. Maybe if a bully or potential bully sat down with an adult with some compassion, and watched this all the way through, the impact may have such a lasting effect on them, that they will make the choice never to bully anyone again, not stand by and watch somebody they know bully others, whether it is online, in person, through notes and snide comments and the like. Watch the VIDEO and read the article below, where the devastated grieving parents share their heartache.

“>http://youtu.be/RzjFf8ywk3c%5D

ONLY after Olivia Penpraze’s death did her parents discover what was really happening online.

Olivia Penpraze was only 19 when she took her own life.

On Tuesday, the 19-year-old from Rowville, who was left brain dead after a suicide attempt, drew her last breath before her parents Warren and Kellie Penpraze turned off her life support.

Her grieving father logged on to her laptop to send out the sad message to her friends the best way he knew how – Facebook.

That’s when he stumbled across his daughter’s online suicide diary. For two years, the petite teen had been chronicling her depression on blogging site Tumblr.

More than 900 pages of posts and photographs revealed her daily heart-wrenching emotional descent. In video posts she talked about being bullied and the desire to not hate herself any more.

In February, she wrote how nice it was to not think about killing herself on her 19th birthday.

Hundreds of photos show the things that made her happy such as kittens, flowers and going to the school formal. Other images were much darker.

Despite disturbing posts, Olivia still offered a shoulder to cry on for online followers who also suffered depression. In one video she announced the date she would attempt suicide, May 1, but she couldn’t wait that long.

The site shocked her father, but what hurt most were not Olivia’s words, it was the people who posted comments urging her to die.

He said: “I can’t understand how someone could sit there and egg someone on to kill themselves. They are pretty damn gutless people.”

Even after Mr Penpraze posted on Olivia’s blog explaining what had happened, there were sick replies.

“They said if she was dead why weren’t you spending time with your family. They didn’t believe she was dead,” Mr Penpraze said.

“She does have friends … who wanted to know what happened but all the hatred-type ones come from people who … post as anonymous.”

The comments became so bad Mr Penpraze disabled the blog and is urging the online community to warn friends and family when they know something is wrong.

“We are finding out now there are kids on her Facebook who actually know her on the Tumblr account. Why are they not getting in touch?” he said.

“If she says she is going to do something on this date they could have told us. Even if it was a false alarm, we could have done something.”

Since her death, hundreds of tributes have been posted.

http://youtu.be/V1kPtvSvags

The devastated family, including brother Alex, 16, will farewell Olivia on Wednesday in Malvern.

May she and the family find peace

 

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39 thoughts on “Bullying just has to stop…This is Olivia Penpraze- She is dead

  1. My heart aches for Olivia’s family. Parents please sit down with your children and watch this. People don’t realise the severe impact of their words and if this can save just one life or perhaps touch the soul of a bully to make them think first then Olivia’s passing will not be in vain. May you always rest in peace sweet girl.

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  2. It’s the worst part of our 21st century society that truly Wonderful people like this young person,Olivia was bullied into taking her own life. I do understand her pain, I too was bullied out of a workplace at the age of 44? It takes on many forms, but ultimately any bullying is life zapping! The pain is silent and unseen.
    I am a parent to a teen, i am constantly watching for signs he is distressed – I urge you to be vigilant with those you love. Above all else, If you are worried speak up and step in for them!

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  3. I would like the parents to know that people in general can be very good at hiding what they really feel. I am a sporting coach (almost 20 years and thousands of athletes)and have had the unfortunate experience of finding out that so many of the kids who have played in the teams have had issues relating to dealing with their day to day lives – cutting, substance abuse, anorexia, bulemia, and suicide attempts. For the most part, and for a very long time after I first met them, they came across as perfectly happy. They joined in and were part of the team, they laughed and joked, had a number of friends, and often were doing well in school. Most were very social and outgoing. Everything, on the surface, seemed fine.
    I can honestly say that even after seeing such people for a long time (I often coach a kid for up to 7 years running) that I don’t know if today I would necessarily recognise if a child had a problem just by looking at them and dealing with them in the normal team training/games as their coach.
    What has happened, often, is that after a time, completely out of the blue, a child will either come to me or a teammate and disclose their pain. Sometimes it is in tears. Sometimes it is just with questions – of am I normal?
    They truly don’t understand why they feel what they feel and believe they are out of control. These very disfunctional methods of handling their pain are ways these kids try to control something – anything – to control their lives.
    Many have said that they didnt want to disappoint their parents or add to the pressures the parents already had in their lives. They were trying to be grown up and handle their issues alone. They wanted to be independent and do it because they perceived that all people just handled their own stuff and that if they didnt then they were weak or damaged.
    Most of all they were afraid they were damaged. They didnt know what was normal and so they feared they were mentally ill for feeling the ways they were. So the last thing they wanted was to admit there was anything wrong and tell another person what a “freak” they felt.
    Friends, they said, if they tried to tell them, would listen for a second then go on to say how much worse they had it. Often these kids would become the one everyone else went to when they had to get things off their chest. The feelings of isolation then deepen because that is more weight to bear with noone to listen to them in return.
    The kids who did open up to me or a teammate were crying out for help. Alot of the time – I am sad to say – their parents had not come to the park to meet me. They had dropped the kids off and gone because they “would be right”. This made discussing the situation of the kids breaking down and telling me they were in trouble really hard.
    Not only did the parents not know me, but they struggled with the idea that their perfect, well-adjusted child had any problems. The image their child had worked so hard to build was such a nice comforting one, that they did not want to hear from a stranger that this was a flawed perspective. How could I possibly know anything about their child that they didnt? So many have reacted with suspicion and on a number of occassions, I have been linked to or held responsible for that child’s behaviours when they were brought to light.
    The kids sometimes were pulled out of the sport. This had the effect of sending the message loud and clear to the child that the image needed to stay or the consequences would be losing your friends and a sport you love.
    As I said before, I had no idea in nearly all cases, that there was any problem until they broke down. Most of those times were sitting down killing time at a tournament between meals and games or something – sharing a joke about something completely random. And I would see something amiss and make the famous mistake of asking…”are you ok?”
    If I had any suggestion from this I would say – Parents, build relationships with your kids’ teachers and sports coaches and other significant adults in their lives. Build pathways of communication and surround your child with a network of supporting adults. Then if they can’t tell you, there might be someone else. And if that someone else talks to you, you will be able to hear rather than attack.
    In the end, it is about what is best for your child and getting them help when they need it.

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  4. I was bullied by people who called themselves my friends in high school. I am 28 years old and find myself in the same position at work. A few years ago I would have thought this is all me I am the issue. All this started when I was given a role at work over someone else. The sad thing is if Olivia’s “friends” who knew about her tumblr account had broughtthis to her parents attention she could have realised that one day too. Olivia was a brave girl – she asked for help everyone who read her blog and laughed they are the pathetic ones. For all the people wholaughed at her or egged her on she would hope that you never would understand the hurt she felt inside.

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  5. Hate to say it, but humans are terrible these days.

    The comments that this young lady received has caused suicide – and the people who gave her these comments I know shouldn’t go to jail.

    Honestly, you don’t go up to someone and say stuff like ‘OH, YOU ARE SO DUMB’ and stuff, just because you have a bad life experience. These comments can cause depression, and can do exactly what this young lady did.

    There was so much going through her life, and nobody found out – now she’s killed herself, and I bet those people who made fun of her are even empathizing.

    Look at that – SHE’S DEAD NOW. I hope those people who made fun of her are happy, because those people are partially a murderer. :

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  6. I just watched the video of Olivia and it brought tears. Bullying and lying cause a deep wound more than any physical harm can.

    I had an ex wife that had an affair and after splitting lied and lied to everyone to cover it up causing hatred to me with all, including the children. This is different but I have been where she was, you come to a point where you sit alone, in the dark and its quiet, its peaceful and you tetter on the edge just one lean and you are gone and no more pain.

    For some, you have a thoughts of others, you fall the other way like me and bring yourself back. Its hard to get people to understand how you feel. To open up to someone who knows what you feel. People like Olivia in that situation need to be able to talk to other people who have been to the darkness and come back.

    Nothing against trained Docs and counsellors but unless you have been there you will never understand.

    All I can say is talk to someone who knows how you feel; the more you talk the better it will be. If people say, committing suicide is selfish who are only thinking of yourself of course you are thinking of yourself.

    YOU ARE NUMBER ONE. YOU ARE IMPORTANT.

    Just remember:

    I will face fear,
    Fear will go around me
    Through me and over me,
    When fear is gone,
    I will remain, stronger.

    Please talk!!!! And stay with us.

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  7. I’m so sorry if I could turn back time I would be her friend all the way throw high school and primary school you are the most strongest people on the world my brother knew her and was almost in tears when he found out about her.
    Our love lies with you our soules fligh with you Olivia

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  8. This probably makes me as bad as the bullies but as a Mother I would dearly love to have my hands around the throat of these gutless wonders. My heart goes out to Olivia’s family and friends. As they say ‘what goes around comes around’. RIP beautiful Olivia.

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  9. How could her parents sit there and say how come nobody told us. did they ever look at their daughter for longer than 5 seconds? as somebody who battled the same thing i find it inexcusable for them to sit their and say that, When you’re that depressed its because you feel like no body cares or nobody is there for you. clearly nobody was there for her. that poor girl!

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  10. So sad
    Just tragic
    I hope no one feels this way
    I wish that she new that there are millions with her and less than hundreds against her

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  11. she may have been an incredibly gifted actor who wore a mask everyday, i didn’t know her. i wear one and i know it isn’t perfect, but it gets me by, for most people.

    but it’s also one thing to recognise that something is wrong with your child, but it’s something else completely to see suicide in them, or perhaps to admit to yourself that you see it there. it’s hard to know what to do, how to be there for someone when you aren’t entirely sure what’s wrong.

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  12. I just wanted to say that I hope olivia has found peace and happiness. I wish someone had been brave enough to try and talk to her family about what she was going through. I wish she had felt important enough to cry out to someone close to her. I sincerely hope that this has shown others that there is always hope… That you are not alone. My heart bleeds for her family and I hope that they will be proud of everything Olivia has done for the world through this.

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  13. My heart goes out to Olivia’s family. This is just so tragic. I know what it feels like, feeling like no-one cares, that your worthless and that no-one would miss you if you go. All these feelings and more were incredibly difficult to deal with and took their toll on me. I was lucky enough to have one friend who noticed that I was changing and she talked to me and really helped me out. All of what happened would have been easier for Olivia if there was someone who noticed, someone who talked to her and helped her out. Sadly though, most of the time people don’t take notice or see a change but don’t do anything about it, I beg of anyone who sees changes similar to Olivias’s, to approach your friend and talk to them about what is happening, it could save their life, just knowing that their is one person out there who cares, who is there for them and will care if they go, believe me it helps.

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  14. I came so close to losing my child last year, a heart beat really, because of bullying. Even 12 months on I still wake in fear of what the day might bring for us. When a child’s spirit is crushed so ruthlessly and callously by constant sniping and degrading comments they never fully heal. My heart goes out to Olivia’s loved ones and all those who read or watch her story and feel her pain.

    My child is seen by those around her as well adjusted and bubbly, I wonder if they will ever see her as she really is. She constantly makes fun of herself and people laugh thinking she is charming. Pity in reality she has been bullied so constantly that she really does believe all the negative things she says about herself and just cleverly hides it behind her smile.

    Lots of professionals have been and gone in her life and they says she’s healing, with every fibre of my being I hope this is true.

    Please be kind to my child and every other person’s child you come across, it takes a second to say something cruel or thoughtless but a lifetime to heal after it.

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  15. My heart n thoughts goes out to you… My daughter came close to suicide after been pinned in a corner of a backyard n constantly being kicked with a soccer ball this caused her to become death in both ears n was traumatised n made fun off for a long time because disability being called names etc etc…Unlike Olivia it was identified during a face book post stating she was sick of life n how she was been treated n it was not worth being alive. A school friend noticed then reported it to the principal at school who then notified myself n action was soon taken to help her turn things around with the constant support of family friends n school. Although she has minor irritations she is now in general a very positive person and is grateful for all she has be given including life… I consider myself lucky…R.I.P Olivia and may the lord n his angels guide n protect you….God bless You Dear Angel…..<3<3<3

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  16. Great article and insight. I had no idea of this story, until friends of mine started joining RIP Olivia Penpraze groups. I thought, who the hell is this, I’ve never heard of her – This is not usually a surprise, I care very little for celebrities or gossip, I do not watch TV or many Hollywood movies, I assumed she must have been another celebrity whose career I never encountered – and I guess she was really.

    Ive been looking for some local charities for my business to support, ill be sure to find an anti-bullying one. I think ive narrowed it down to 4 and a percentage of our quarterly income will go to each one.

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  17. I remember as a child and was bullied(as were many others) my parents told me “sticks and stones may break my bones,but names will never hurt me”.How wrong these words are,broken bones can be fixed,but a broken spirit can’t.I hope Olivia has finally found peace and I hope her parents will also eventually be able to come to terms with their loss(I know they will always grieve for and miss Olivia) and the strength to go on.Finally I hope people who read about Olivia,be they the bullies or the bullied,find the ability to speak up and put an end to this terrible menace in society,being different is not a crime and people do not deserve to be punished for whatever makes them different.

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  18. Kellie, Warren & Alex, my heart goes out to you all, my thoughts & prayers are with you all as well as the rest of your family.. May Olivia be in peace now with our Dear Lord and Saviour.. I can’t imagine what you are all going through but I know the feeling of loss (there was a murder in our family) also I understand the pain of enduring bullying.. My daughter who is now almost 18 suffered from bullying in primary school & high school, I used to feel so mad at those girls, thinking, “who do you think you are being so mean to my daughter, excluding her & making her feel like an outcast” she was meant to be in year12 this year, we were both so looking forward to her being in year 12, she really wanted to wear a senior jersey & also really wanted to wear a beautiful dress for her formal & have photos with her family & a mother/daughter photo.. The school never helped (as in the high school, I would love to say the name of the school, but don’t know what the implications could be) there were vicious rumors going on about her which were pornographic in nature ( I did contact the police in regards to that) I also got so mad one day & went to the train station where these girls were waiting to catch the train home from school.. I yelled at them & said “do you have any idea, the pain & suffering you are putting my daughter through & as a mother how do you think that makes me feel” I then said “wait til you have a daughter one day or a son, you will do anything you can to protect them” I said “how would you feel if your daughter was being bullied” then I said ” karma will come back & haunt you one day” my daughter has no friends, she is scarred from her bullying, she hangs around me her 43yr old mum, I’m her best friend, her confident, the one she tells all her little problems too(WHEN IN FACT SHE SHOULD HAVE A GIRLFRIEND TO TELL ALL THOSE LITTLE THINGS TO, TALK ABOUT BOYS, MAKEUP, HOT GUYS ETC..) I’m so mad at how society is today, the schools should just straight away suspend or expel any children who are bullies, but no they don’t do that, they doubt your story & say everything will be ok.. By the way I live in Brisbane..

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  19. Hello everyone. This story affected me in a big way. I have started a facebook page to raise awareness of online bullying. I am hoping it can also be a forum for people to come together to discuss the issue. If you would like to help build it let me know and I will be glad to add you as admin. http://www.facebook.com/FacelessBullying
    Thank-you

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  20. dear olivia’s family, i saw the video on this blog and it was just shocking, my mother cried of the loss of your beautiful daughter, It’s just unbelievable on how nasty bullies get.

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  21. im and 17 and i suffed from bullying i ended up moveing away because i was always getting bullyed and i always ended u getting into to fight because i tried to stick up for my self i ended up giveing up after i got bashed by four girls and it all got put on youtube in 2010 i never could trust anyone and still cant now i ended up move at the end of last year now that i have moved away the bullying has stoped and all i want to do is halp people that are getting bullyed i find it so sad rest in peace Olvia. you seem to touch many hearts

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  22. I feel for Olivia’s family. She is brave and strong. I am in my forties and have been bullied most of my life I work remotely – and tried to bring it up as the 2IC where I work bullies me. They would arrange things out of work and actually exclude me. I know that being bullied (and this included my older siblings) makes me lose confidence in my abilities Like Olivia – it brings me down. I come back to my room at night sometimes – and think if I take my life it would teach them. However, I know inside me that is not the solution. I now am looking forward to new job. Work has coughed up that I have to fly myself home from remote site – whilst a contractor who resigns gets flown home! I sometimes shake my head in amazement of this world. Olivia was brave – but people if you see something like that video take action – don’t ignore or encourage someone to take their own life. Every person on this earth is beautiful in their own way

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  23. My thoughts go out to Olivia’s family, such a tragic loss of a beautiful young woman. Unfortunately society in general has allowed an escalation of bullying where ever you are, school, sports, home, work. I don’t know what the answer is however believe we have to continue to educate people of all ages, bullying is not acceptable. The constant nasty comments and actions can have long term affects upon the recipient. It all starts with each one of us, be kind to your fellow human being. Be respectful, show you care and love yourself as much as you would love others. Life is precious and a gift.

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  24. When it comes to people threatening or talking suicide on the web.
    Call the police or threaten to if someone talks about suicide, people online pull this s%$# all the time, which is why most internet goers don’t bat an eyelid anymore, because they never do it they just do it for attention and kicks, but to play it safe, respond to people threatening suicide by informing the authorities after they get a surprise intervention and invasive psychological analysis and immense embarrassment they are sure to never ever do it again, least they have to be committed to psychological observation.

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  25. Facebook and social networking is a destructive, socially damaging tool that should not exist. This is what is causing depression in young people and it is incredibly sad. These social networking sites are the complete opposite of social, and in emotionally fragile people they can push them to the edge. They celebrate narcisstic behaviour and turn “friendship” into a commodity. As a 21 year old who has suffered from depression in the past, I can say without a doubt that deleting my Facebook account and communicating with friends in the real world and via phone/email is a much more satisfying and uplifting experience. This young girl had the world ahead of her and it is a very sad story, RIP.

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  26. Please understand that when it comes to threats of suicide – ALL should be taken seriously!
    Isn’t someone’s life more important than possibly being fooled by someone claiming falsely they are suicidal?
    By speaking out, the fakes are exposed – hopefully that claim is taken down – while the genuine ones get the help needed – hopefully before its too late.

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  27. I’ve seen some anon hates on Tumblr, and it’s absolutely revolting. They are gutless, heartless and I don’t even know if they have any human emotions at all. I’m sure the anonymous option was not there for people to post hate, and I really hope Tumblr staff could do something about it. R.I.P. Olivia.

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  28. Robbo have you looked into the secrets video in which she confesses that she was forced to have sex with her brother. Small amount floating around a bout it but video has since been taken off you tube. There are some screen captures floating around. Sounds like there is more to the story than we know.

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  29. i am not good with words im sorry.

    im 15. I suffer from depression, and have thought about (on a regular basis) and tried to commit suicide before.
    i saw Olivia’s video only a couple of hours ago, and it got me thinking.
    i have been bullied a lot. for 10 years now and it has just gotten worse as time goes by, i have been getting called ugly, stupid, a bitch, un-loveable, a slut on a regular basis, when i am far from any of those, i am a shy quiet girl and to hide my pain i smile and with very few words i pretend that im ok. but its not those comments that get me down its the comments like, go kill yourself, or your are better off dead,we would like it better with you dead, you are a waste of air, time, space, and you cant do anything right you couldn’t even kill yourself properly (this comment is the comment i get from the girl that used to be my bestfriend)
    the people i trusted the most, have turned against me and have joined in on harassing me,so apart from my mum who doesnt know what to say or do i am alone. i guess making comment is more is more fun than being a friend.

    im just trying to say that getting people aware of depression and the effects that words and actions have would be a good idea. because their are people out their like Olivia or myself that dont know what else to do and are so miserable and tired of fighting and tired of being treated like we are being treated, that all we can do is give up.
    in my opinion more people need to be aware and more schools need to do something, because most of the time school is where it starts. (my school have swept my problems under the rug, and have told me for the past 3 years, to just put up with the comments and ignore them because they will go away.) schools need to be able to do something either to stop the bullying from happening or to offer help and support to the students who are being bullied.

    All ive ever wanted is to be happy, but happiness is so hard.

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    • Jessika, I put a post on here about 4 weeks ago & it is about my daughter being bullied & the pain & suffering I feel too watching & listening to my daughter feeling sad & depressed about life… Search for my daughter on Facebook & add her (chrissie bee) someone who knows how you feel will be a good comfort & support for you…

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  30. Dear Jessika,

    You write very well, and show your feelings and your pain so very well, and I feel for you.

    Honey, these people, who are raised the same as their parents, are the ones with the problem. Imagine saying what they say to people – they are low of the low to tell someone to take their life.

    I can tell that you are a lovely, sensitive young woman, who has a lot to offer, and that you already have done so!

    Unfortunately, humans feel jealous of others, it is so common that those who are victims of other people’s jealousy don’t realise that is what is happening.

    Jessika, hold on, you can get through this horrible time in your life and choose to spend time with “real people”.

    Ask your Mum if you can learn through Distance Education (Brisbane School of Distance Education – 1800 018151 to break this cycle) the teachers are fabulous, it is schooling of the future, they are very well respected.

    Stay here, talk to us, we are all mums who are on this site who care for other people – talk to us, and don’t let those awful, jealous, petty people, raised that way by their families upset you. You are the strong one, the good one!!!

    Talk to me, I am here for you!

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  31. As a year 12 student, it always breaks my heart seeing bullying. It was very sad that I had only heard about this a few weeks ago and crying in school while watching it with a group of friends. It honestly surprised me and scared me. I looked around my year that day and realised that bullying is out there in the schoolyard and we as a school don’t talk about it enough. I cant imagine why it isn’t talked about enough and made more aware! She is beautiful in everyway and I give my condolences to her family <3

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