… Don’t dip your pen in the company ink. Don’t screw the crew. And on a far more disgusting note, don’t sh*t where you eat. Wow. That last one was really gross and reminds me of his morning routine so given that sleep time is nigh, I’m going to try and pour bleach in my ears and eyes to get rid of that image.
As per my usual modus operandi, I’m uploading my notes from today in lieu of my post in the short term. I’m sure you can see whilst reading through them how cringe-worthy a moment it was when 2 ladies pointed out to me that the person reading over my shoulder and sitting next to me was a BC supporter. And trust me, there was significant effort going into reading my notes. I briefly considered writing “If you can read this, you’re too close and freakin’ nosey!!!”…. But with the copious amount of BS flying out of the mouth of our star witness, I barely had time to pop my QuickEze, let alone deal with the prying eyes of my neighbour.
So until I regain some energy… enough to rustle up some decent satirical wittiness… these will have to tide you over…. Enjoy xx